Too old/busy/jaded to 'social network,' but still want to seem hip?

A colleague forwarded me this article by Mark Morford of the SF Chronicle and I had to LOL....

"Are you a Net neophyte? Very, very late bloomer? Profoundly paranoid about the totally CIA-monitored Interweb?

Do you still prefer to get your news and information from disposable printed matter made from poor ol' trees because you believe all high-tech gizmos are a total soul-sucking waste of time except maybe for your George Foreman grill and the old FM radio in the truck? Read on, friend."